Many of us have fantasies about being dominated by someone who forces on us things that secretly excite us. It’s up to me as a writer to give the reader what she'd never admit to wanting. The more secret a desire, the more arousing it can be to have it expressed. Yet what excites the reader is not necessarily something she'd actually like to do, or have done to her. She may simply like to read about it.
I write both BDSM and vanilla erotica because I enjoy reading both. I don't believe in a clear distinction; the labels merely indicate directions on a continuum of sexual expression. Heathcliff is violent and frightening and so is Dracula. Darcy is not frightening, though he's stern and forbidding. These three protagonists lie at different points on the line, but all are romantically and sexually attractive. Their dark aspects are a large part of their attraction. Morticia (The Addams Family) says, "You frightened me... Do it again."
My characters have different positions on the sexual spectrum. Despite her sexual enthusiasm, Rhoda stands towards the vanilla end. Helen is more adventurous, ranging along the line, enjoying severe BDSM and vanilla by turns.
The sadist and the masochist, despite the joke cliche, are not good bedfellows. The ideal partner for the masochist is probably another masochist, who'll understand what the 'victim' desires, and deliver it in the most satisfying way. Most satisfying for the 'victim', that is. It's a heavy burden, to be responsible for another's punishment - and delight.
